Parenting Books For Fathers
There are many ideas about raising children. Some parents adopt the ideas their own parents used. Others seek advice from their friends. Some read books about parenting. Others take classes offered in the community. No one has all the answers. However, psychologists and other social scientists now know what parenting books for fathers practices are more effective and are more likely to lead to positive outcomes for children. Ideas about raising children can be grouped into three styles. These are different ways of deciding who the family is responsible for what. Authoritarian parents always try to be in control and exert control over children. These parents set strict rules to try to maintain order, and usually do not show much affection or love the child. Try to establish strict standards of conduct and are usually very critical of children for not meeting the criteria. We tell children what to do, try to make them obey and they usually do not give them good options. Authoritarian parents do not explain why they want their children to do things. If a child asks a rule or order, the parent might answer, "Because I said so. " Parents tend to focus on negative behavior, rather than positive, and punish or scold children, often severely, for they do not follow the rules. Permissive parents give up most control to their children. Set very few rules, if they fix some, and those that do are usually not enforced uniformly. Do not want to be tied to a routine. They want their children to feel free. They do not set boundaries or clear behavioral expectations for their children, and tend to accept in a warm and loving, no matter the behavior of children. Permissive parents give children many choices as possible, even if the child is not able to make a good decision. Tend to accept the child's behavior, whether good or bad, and do not comment on whether it is beneficial or not. They may feel unable to change misbehavior, or choose not to get involved. Parents who have a democratic style give choices based on abilities. For a young child, the choice may be between the red shirt or striped. For an older child, the choice may be between an apple, an orange or banana. Parents guide children's behavior by teaching, not punishing. "Maribel you hit the truck. That hurt. Let us keep the truck until you can play with it safely. " Perhaps used in combination. Think about what you want your children to learn. Studies in child development shows that the most positive outcomes occur when parents use democratic styles. Children of permissive parents tend to be more aggressive and act out, while children with authoritarian parents tend to be docile and submissive and have low self-esteem. Treat your child with respect. Talk and ask questions. Be polite. Avoid nagging, yelling and hitting. If your child misbehaves in public, take it home. Avoid humiliating. Maybe she is tired or hungry. Next time, plan the trip after you slept or eaten. Be consistent. Do not be permissive at a time and narrow in another. Make sure everyone follows the rules, even you. Make promises only when you are sure you can keep. As parents, please refer to each other and maintain a united front so that the child does not try to make them fight to achieve their purposes. Encourage your child. Help build confidence in itself. Say, "I know I can do" or, "You worked really hard on that. " Avoid criticism. Do not compare one child with another. . . .